Wednesday, September 4, 2013

My Love.

I say a lot of things I don’t mean and I feel that they have sunk in and have become something you believe now. I hate when I told you just to leave and walk away, because that is the last thing I ever wanted, what I really meant was hold me, protect me. You drove me crazy with so many things, but the greatest of those things was love. My heart spilled over with love for you, every second of every day. I wish I could give you everything you ever wanted. That we could laugh together like we use to, to be carefree around each other, chase each other around the house. I miss a lot of things, but I miss the small things most. The goodbye kisses in the morning before you left for work, the adorable face you got when you wanted me to make you something to eat, getting lost with you, date nights, coming home to you after work each day.  

 

I told you yesterday to not text me unless you were willing to work on our relationship. I was so scared. I sit and look at my phone today and not a single text or message. My heart aches. Where did we go wrong? When exactly did I lose you? When I am with you I feel as though I am home where I belong no matter where we are. I want your arms around me and to feel your heartbeat in your chest beneath my head. I pray that God holds you in his hands and close to his heart. That he would grab your soul, because a lifetime without you kills me but eternity without you hurts so much more.




You my love have a HUGE heart that not everyone has seen. When I was asked to donate just a dollar you said yes, when I was so quick to answer no. When a friend needed help, while I complained, you helped. You my love are amazing in so many ways. I have seen the good in you and the bad, I chose you with seeing both sides. You have a soft, sweet, gentle heart for our babies when they were sick and wanted snuggle time and held them so tight. 


 

What have I learned in all this? Life is short, hold those you love close, don't sweat the small things, choose your battles. Love with everything you have because you are not guaranteed tomorrow.

Romans 12:12

Xoxo

Nicole

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